Caring for the Caregiver
December 18, 2023 | Community Based Services, Health & Wellness, Resources
This season is a meaningful time of celebration and togetherness, but for those who regularly take care of others, it can feel overwhelming. About 4.5 million direct care workers support individuals in homes, residential care and nursing facilities, and hospitals; another 43.5 million informally provide care for at least one loved one. Over 40% of caregivers report symptoms of depression, and nearly 24% say that caregiving has negatively impacted their own physical health. Whether caring for aging parent, young child, or in-need loved one, it’s important for paid and unpaid caregivers to also care for themselves.
Here are five suggestions for caregivers to reduce the pressure this season and throughout the year.
- (Re)Set your needs. The most important action any caregiver can take is to take care of themselves first. So, protect your health and joy. Focus on eating healthily whenever possible; prioritize your own medical appointments. Schedule “you” time and treat yourself to activities that comfort or support you, like visiting a friend or binge-watching a favorite show. Also, remain firm with boundaries. For example, people may want to drop by, unannounced, to visit; feel free to limit when others can impose. Fill your tank before you fill others’.
- Communicate honestly. As a caregiver, it can be tricky knowing how much to tell someone. Perhaps you think others aren’t “pulling their weight” or feel isolated because you are afraid to freely discuss challenges. Talking openly and respectfully can provide opportunities for support and relief. Plan what you want to say without accusatory language, encourage the other person to chat, be specific and concrete about your request, and actively listen throughout the conversation. Remember: You can’t control other people’s reactions, but you can control yours.
- Focus on the do-able. To-do list items can multiply with frustrating ease and speed; it seems like once you finish a task, two others replace it. When the list is out of control, take on the small jobs that immediately show progress. Folding the clothes, taking out the trash, putting away the groceries, or straightening up a room establishes order out of chaos and reaffirms your control. The small things can positively reinforce all your accomplishments.
- Let others lead. A caregiver is a companion, problem-solver, logistics specialist, advocate, operations manager, financial adviser, and so many other positions rolled into one. To prevent burnout, the caregiver must delegate and rely on others. So, share a shopping wish list of things that would make the day-to-day easier, whether that’s extra pillows or small appliances. Ask others to complete home tasks such as changing a lightbulb, having a car serviced, or prepping meals for the week. Coordinate significant time away, for a spa day or vacation. You don’t have to do it all.
- Support your mental health. Caregivers have a higher risk for developing mental health disorders; tending to your mental health should be a priority. Some simple ways to start include coloring, which calms the brain and helps your body relax; journaling, which helps manage anxiety and depression; and meditating, which can restore peace and balance. Find a professional counselor or support group to connect with regularly. Or, the Rosalyn Carter Institute for Caregivers has a text line if you need support; text TOUGH to 741741 for free, 24/7 crisis counseling.
Let’s extend the spirit of care to those who care for others, ensuring that their resilience and selflessness are celebrated and supported.
Sources: Family Caregiver Alliance; AHIP; A Place for Mom; CaringBridge; PsychCentral; Rosalyn Carter Institute for Caregivers.
